A Random Guide to Surviving Mercury Retrograde
A Random Guide to Surviving Retrograde
We’re halfway into our first Mercury Retrograde of the year, and this whole time I have been working on my website, social media pages and launching my new professional path. If you talk with anyone familiar with the spiritual world and Retrograde, this is supposed to be a big no-no. In fact, on a recent business call a few days ago, I was directly asked, “You’re starting your business during Mercury Retrograde?” Yes, yes I am. I am that crazy whack-a-doodle who has dared herself, albeit cautiously, to launch her new business during one of the most difficult times of the year. Don’t get me wrong; it hasn’t been easy. It feels like right as Retrograde started, everything has bounced from breathing in the inspiring Zen moments to juggling downright chaos, all without any gentle transition between the two. And yet, this is what every Mercury Retrograde is supposed to feel like!
Mercury Retrograde is supposed to kick your ass. And, kick your ass hard. So, if the last 10 days have felt wonky to you, fear not, you are not alone and you will get through this. Like the badass you are, you will brace yourself and come along for this fantastic voyage, even if it doesn’t feel the least bit fantastic in this moment. For this journey, you’ll need to bear with the bizarre adventures that occur during this tumultuous three-week storm because it’s bound to get rocky. Fortunately, over the years, I have amassed various tools and lessons to help me get through Retrograde (thank you, past mistakes!), and I’d like to share them with you today. You don’t know me well yet. But I’m a huge fan of numbers and their symbolism. The number 8 holds magical significance across various cultures symbolizing wealth, prosperity, rebirth, renewal, resurrection and infinite intellect. For that reason, let’s start with 8 ways to survive Mercury Retrograde.
#1 Surrender Your Ego (my favorite!)
Oh, there’s nothing quite like waking up to the smell of sweet, sweet defeat. When everything is descending upon you, begging you to do everything at once. When you feel buried in an avalanche of tom-foolery. I know this feeling all too well. Last week, our 4-year old developed pink eye just as I was finally feeling the momentum to get my website finished. But this wasn’t just any pink eye. This pink eye brought its friends: Snotty Nose Jackson, Eternally Whimpering Wanda, and Hacking Cough McGillicuddy, and these friends required around-the-clock care. Getting her to accept eye drops three times a day involved epic battles filled with shrieks, tears and the occasional dropping to my knees in prayer (I might have shed some tears too). Now, you should also know that I have an infant, a spouse having to work crazy busy hours, and two dogs whose skin allergies have decided to flare up which now require daily medicines. Said medicines by the way unfortunately gave one of them the runs. Two days in to all of this, I felt defeated. Completely and utterly defeated. Rather than keep fighting everything heading toward me, I chose to surrender to it in between a few more tears. The simplest answer in these difficult times is to surrender to the madness, to put your ego in the back seat, and to place faith and trust in something greater than yourself. Retrograde may kick you down and knock the air out of you. But releasing your struggle and transferring it to a higher source, like the universe or G-d, can feel so liberating. In my world, what comes down must go up. Lest you be afraid of what awaits you after falling into the pit of overwhelm, trust in a silver lining and the much-needed lessons to learn at this time. Trust that you are always being supported and that you shall rise above anything that veers you off your path!
#2 Stillness
After those moments of surrender, you will receive a bit of serenity. Like a good friend quietly embracing you in your most fragile state, stillness is there. You may stare blankly at the chaos in your midst and feel numb. But rather than identifying this feeling as numbness, reframe it as a Zen state, where you allow everything to pass you by without disturbing your inner happy place. So, when a client pushes for that contract he just sent to be approved like yesterday or you need to publish that blog by 8:00 a.m. and you’re staring at a blank page the night before at 11:59 p.m. and you start to feel that rise in anxiety and stress, remember to breathe deeply, practice meditation and then float in the calm, undisturbed waters of your mind. Also, take the time to withdraw and make yourself a large vat of your fave chamomile, ginger, local wildflower honey tea and steep in this awe-filled U2 melody (It’s called “Numb” just in case you were wondering). You’ve got a new houseguest, though I prefer the term squatter, for three weeks and you’ll need something extra to keep your Zen flow going. This brings me to the next point!
#3 Mindfulness
Imagine that the sloth is your new Spirit Animal. Every movement you make embodies attentive intentionality. No matter how much you try to accomplish right now, there is no benefit to rushing this experience. In fact, when you do scurry past each order of business, you’re likely missing or forgetting a key detail and creating an issue for yourself down the line. It may be tomorrow, next week or right after Retrograde leaves us in its shaky wake. Either way, you will have wished you channeled your inner tortoise in reaching your goal. Why? Because Retrograde invites us to slow down, to reflect, to pay attention to every single detail, and to read the fine print ad nauseum. What’s more, we’re invited to embrace being fully present with all that is in the now. Invest in a book on mindfulness, like Eckhart Tolle’s “The Power of Now.” Now go ahead and embrace your inner sloth! You can thank me later.
#4 Disconnect
These next few weeks with technology will feel like a love-hate relationship; which means that if you’d like to submit your taxes on time, do not under any circumstances wait until the 15th, as this day also happens to be the last day of Retrograde’s long overdue stay. Your BFF Technology thinks this 3-week period is an ab-fab time to prank you nearly every chance it gets. In my experience, you’re bound to lose something important, like a year’s worth of family photos after my phone died suddenly. You too can expect the following “energetic interferences:” cell phone and wi-fi signal interruptions, audio and video mysteriously erased, document and spreadsheet data being deleted even after supposedly auto-saving, glitchy software, and a disruptive cable or satellite signal (especially when you’re about to binge watch your fave show). Before you begin launching all technology into the middle of a fire pit dedicated to the Retrograde Gods, take a step back and consider the following: 1) it’s time to back up all of your data, 2) make sure to back up your data often no matter how ridiculous it feels, and 3) you’re probably in need of some time apart from your BFF Technology anyway. The universe is sending you on an imaginary castaway island retreat and you can only bring a few things. Are you ready for the challenge? If so, then prepare that much desired tropical mocktail (no need to poke the bear with too much alcohol right now), walk in nature, meditate, and reconnect with the hidden mysteries of the analog world. Who knows? By April 16th, you may find yourself uninterested in returning fully to the digital world.
#5 Active Communication
In between catching up on your fave Netflix show, you’ll want to add to the top of your queue Abbott and Costello’s “Who’s on First?” It’ll seem eerily familiar when communicating during Retrograde. You can type the same email multiple times or have the same talk with that one coworker over and over again. Somehow your message will not be heard, leaving you frustrated and confused. Brace yourself as misunderstandings and conflicts are abound when Mercury is in Retrograde. Fortunately, you can limit the quantity and intensity of these disagreements by brushing up on your active listening skills, and by rereading and rethinking your message as many times as needed. Be sure to clearly (read: painfully) select the appropriate word choices for what you wish to convey. In fact, now is the perfect time to get out that dusty thesaurus. Because this is the time to slow your pace and be deliberate with your intended message, you’re likely going to feel like you’re on repeat. And, if by chance you are on the receiving end of a miscommunication, try not to take the other person’s frustration personally. A heartfelt apology along with repeating the person’s message verbatim will go a long way in rebuilding your relationship.
#6 Detachment
This is a great time to start reflecting on the level of attachment you have to the personal/business relationships in your life, along with both your physical objects and “mind clutter." Your mantras right now are: Spring Cleaning, Spring Break, Spring into Action. It’s no coincidence that this Mercury Retrograde also coincides with the beginning of spring. It’s a time to pause, delve deep, reevaluate your inventory, discard all the expired items, deep clean the nooks and crannies of your spaces, and restock your shelves with the absolute basics. This process of elimination will force you to do an internal audit by revisiting your past habits and any outdated ways of thinking that no longer serve your highest self. The purge in my house looks like every room has been hit by a tornado. Full disclosure, that tornado is me. And on a personal and professional level, my goal is to evaluate and build up the positive while stepping away from the toxic and negative. Focus more on who you are now and what new tools and relationships help support you living your best life. In other words: pull back the curtain from your inner Oz, shed the weight of your past, and let your true self shine.
#7 Vulnerability and Honesty
You’re going to sense lots of emotions from your past creeping back up. You might want to push these feelings aside, hide them in some comfort food or a Happy Hour, and then move forward with your day. But if you know anything about Retrograde, you’ll know it has no interest in what you want to do; only what you need to do to elevate your path and thrive the rest of the year. Remember that there are two more Retrogrades coming this year which means it’s best to train your mind, body, and spirit for what lies ahead. In the great words of Frou Frou, “There’s beauty in the breakdown.” (A huge thank you to my mentor, Becky, for reconnecting me with this gem.) Your best bet is jump into this Emo bootcamp, get real close with that sweat-inducing side of your past, and werk.it.out. If it helps you power through, try repeating the following, April showers bring May flowers.
#8 Bliss
After you’ve shed all the tears, you’ll find unparalleled joy and delight by the end (and during if you can remember to sprinkle these 2 things in your daily routine). Yes, part of your renewed ecstatic state will be because Mercury Retrograde is on its way out the door. However, experiencing all of the snags and snafus along the way will only intensify all the positive moments that do pop up. Finding the blessings in each experience, positive and unpleasant, will serve as a helpful everyday coping strategy, long after Retrograde ends.
I invite you to take the time to digest these recommendations and to remember that they may flow in no particular order. Of course, they don’t; It’s Retrograde. No matter how much you plan your life, the only thing you can expect is that the unexpected will occur and you will survive this. Bear in mind that Mercury Retrograde adopts Murphy’s Law to help us level up. So, when you start to doubt your sanity, replay the following Facebook meme that read, “Every next level of your life will demand a different you.” Get ready for a new you. And, before you head to bed on April 15th, take a moment to thank Mercury Retrograde for all its glorious life lessons and then make sure to lock the doors before the next squatter, ehr Retrograde, arrives on July 26th. Mark your calendars!